LIFE IS AN EXCLAMATION - get the thrill out of it

  LIFE IS AN EXCLAMATION - AHH !!


  LIFE IS A VERB - SELF MAKING

Life is evolutionary and planetary exuberance. It is more like a verb. It is Autopoietic, Self-making.  Life is open to universe and itself. Beach sand is usually silicon dioxide, but so are the innards of a main frame computer. But computer is not a pile of sand. The main frame computer is intelligent thinking stuff manufactured from stupid stuff like sand.                          

LIFE IS NEGATIVE ENTROPY

Life too is a nexus of increasing sensitivity and complexity in a universe of parent matter that seems stupid and unfeeling in comparison. Life is Holographic like a drop of ocean water. That drop of water contains all life form on microscopic scale just as it exists in the big ocean. Life is transmutations of earth’s air water and sunlight into cells, bacteria. Life is self-renewing and fungi as recyclers help us to keep the entire planet brimming with life form, terra firma. It is matter gone wild, capable of choosing its own direction in order to indefinitely stall the inevitable movement of thermodynamic equilibrium–Entropy. Entropy is the universal tendency for order to breakdown into disorder, just like the rest of the Milky Way and beyond into the other worlds.  Fortunately for us, Earth and human physiology are islands of negative entropy. We are living off solar energy, borrowed from our sizzling neighbor the Sun.

LIFE STARTS WITH BACTERIA

Bacteria living in intimate associations gave rise to myriad chimeras, mixed beings of which we represent a tiny fraction of an expanding progeny. Life is the strange new fruit of individuality evolved by symbiosis: swimming, conjugating, bargaining, and dominating through corporeal mergers.

Today we have large corporations surviving the economic downfall by bargaining and mergers too. These disparate beings invented meiotic sex, programmed death and complex multi cellularity, to evolve and survive the competition of overcrowding and limited resources exactly like it is happening now, on our planet of 7 billion people, plus 10 billion live stocks.

Bacteria can swim, photosynthesize, cause decay, detect light, produce alcohol, ferment sugars, use up carbon dioxide and hydrogen, convert waste into methane, waft hydrogen, fix nitrogen, fabricate glues, precipitate magnetite, rust and iron oxides.

HISTORY OF HUMAN BACTERIA

Let us go back another 2000 million years–The Earth’s surface had just started to cool down and life began as No Nucleus bacteria. We had a variety of them to complement each other. Halophiles were salt loving, while Thermophiles were heat loving. Do you see thread of survival, LOVE. You survive only when you are in love and loving, be it heat, friendship, salt or methane gas. It is the basic emotion which keeps the world going. We had metal workers in Cynobacteria and nitrogen fixers as Heterocyst. Finally, we had our own heating gas producers, the Methogens. Overcrowding, hunger, and thirst lead to the evolvement of a better variety of bacteria, INDIVIDUALITY, as cell membrane. In the beginning we had unicellulars, named as Protists and latter on multicellulars, called as Protoctisis. These guys worked hard for millions of years, to give us and finally evolve into Ribosomal DNA / RNA molecules.

LOVE & LOVING ARE THE COMMON THREADS

Then it took another million years to get to fungi, and plants. Gradually, we had sea creatures who were salt water loving. Latter on we got fresh water loving species, and finally the amphibian animals, including we humans, who are oxygen loving. We ended up loving each other, and procreating in the process, as a bye product, while we basically remained Cosmic Energy or God loving. 

THE PARADOX OF MATTER & MIND

What is Matter?  Never Mind! – What is Mind?  No matter!  We are back to square one, where we started. Things are physical parts of Thoughts and Thoughts are the mental parts of Things. Does it look very complicated?  Let’s go deeper into the matter, or the heart of the matter.

MATTER IS HIGHLY SMALL & ATOMIC 

All matter is made up of small particles called molecules. Molecules themselves are a cluster of even smaller stuff called Atoms. Atoms vibrate so fast that they appear motionless. Matter vibrates so slowly that it appears motionless, too. Atoms themselves are not alone. They have Protons, Electrons and Neutrons.

INNATE INTELLIGENCE IN EVERY PARTICLE

These sub atomic particles are not only minuscule but they are separated by lots of space called Voids. Voids mean empty space, literally nothing. Surprisingly, these Voids are mysteriously imprinted with information, called innate intelligence. This essential stuff is thinking Non-stuff. It is pulsating with invisible intelligence. This intelligence reaches out into chaos (Void) and from Quantum Soup forms beautiful symmetries.

LIFE WILL CONTINUE FOR EVER

Human life form is itself a very high embodiment of evolutionary generosity, sensitivity, and tolerance developed over long eons. Life, having once come into existence will continue forever. It is a watery membrane, bound encapsulation of space-time. Bacteria, never having gone extinct, continue to protect us as their populations grow prodigiously. We as bacteria, are immortal, but as human beings, are mortal, very fragile.

THE MATTER OF OUR BODIES & POSSESSIONS BELONGS TO THE BIOSPHERE

Human beings are a bundle of bacteria, which use up oxygen to generate energy and survive. But now microbes, find us very attractive as a desirable food, dead or alive. They are the Pathogens in service, to clean up our human environment. We, with are nomadic past, are still adjusting to the idea that in a closed system, the fruits of our labor and loins cannot be accumulated endlessly. They must be distributed, returned to the system whence they came from. This is a difficult lesson to learn. The matter of our bodies, our possessions, and our wealth is not ours. It belongs to the Earth, Biosphere. It must be returned again and again. Changes are the norm and remember it forever. We live in a sensuous world where details determine food and mate choices that in cases spell the difference between life and death, between procreation and barrenness.       

LIFE IS AN EXTERNAL DANCE

Life is an external dance. The movements of the dance are choreographed through Awareness. Life is analogous to a pail of muddy water. When the water is stirred and wavy you cannot see the reflection of the sun in the water. But when the stirring and waves have been stopped by meditation, the surface of the muddy water in the pail becomes still then you can see the reflection of the sun. This is an allegory and the explanation is as follows. Muddy stands for all the dirty, foul, spiteful thoughts in our head. The stirring and waves in the water mean that we have mind full of excitement, duality, and confusion. The still water surface stands for the quietude mind using meditation to bring about Quiescence. Sun implies Cosmic Energy’s reflection in the still waters.

MEDITATION HELPS  TO SIMPLIFY LIFE

It is very much possible to earn GRACE with repeated meditation and utter faith in cosmic energy. Grace is the divine dispensation that waves the payment of Karmic debts, in this very life. Meditation is the way out of linear Time. Deep meditation takes you into a sense of timelessness or eternity, where the karmic chains break away. It is here that the karmic debts are cancelled when you transcend your Ego.

KARMIC DUES HAVE TO BE PAID

Karmic forces act on individuals existing out there, separate from the world. But when you meditate and be one with the universe and the world, the karma is overcome. Karma is cosmic justice. Dues have to be paid when a lesson of life is not learned. Dues pile up as huge debts. Learn the system, the foreign language of silence. The ignorant drown in the ocean, in which the mystics swim. 

  ASSERT NOW TOWARD'S LIFE'S PURPOSE

Self-effort will make an angel out of you. Few people try to develop the potentials of their bodies, mind, and soul. Rest of us are, victims of circumstances of their past, and ignorance based beliefs. Our mind has convinced us of many limitations we imposed on ourselves. We never exercise our free will in anything. It is killed in childhood for the fear of hurting others. To idle is to harm self. You ossify and become a fossil. Live creatively now or never, live rightly now, this life and not the next life. Assert yourself. You are not a bird or a beast. You have to break the bonds of delusion and choose now. We can choke with mud of accumulated ignorance or cleanse it by dredging with the shovel of knowledge. The fundamental choice between remaining bound and enslaved or to awaken up from sleep and your hypnosis of ego has to be made now. Now is the gateway to Eternity.     

Personally, I was brought up in the standard God fearing environment, but very quickly I understood and changed to God loving/Cosmic Energy loving. The influences came from my mother who was attracted to universal teachings of Radha Swami & me to Awakening with Brahma Kumaris, and Lala Hardyal’s book “Hints on self-culture”. Being a part of medical family, I experienced pain & sickness from very close quarters, which prepared me for accepting death as a very natural and common phenomenon. I live in a detached mode because we are here temporarily for a short time and then gone. Each one of us rises up after death but awareness makes all the difference. I have concrete plans to die in meditation with no thought on my mind. Our last thought becomes the template for next life, and I do not wish to provide Nature with any template for next life. This is my personal task to try for Nirvana. I may not succeed but I would have the satisfaction that I tried and a respectable carried forward karma account for the next life, just in case.

   Rohit Khanna -  IN-SIGHTED therefore EXCITED 

ALL PHYSICAL THINGS ARE MADE FROM INVISIBLE STUFF - read on

  

  ALL PHYSICAL THINGS ARE MADE FROM INVISIBLE STUFF
  
  SO ARE WE HUMANS - evolved top soil.

SUNLIGHT – A STRAND OF SEVEN

What do you see, when the sun’s ray’s fall down on us? White light!  Not exactly, white light. This white light is actually made up of seven different colorful rays, the rainbow colors of different frequencies. What else do you NOT see up there? On each side of the rainbow. We have the famous ultraviolet rays and infrared rays. All of the above rays, invisible to us, are definitely coming down on us. Then we have the heat waves in the sun rays. They warm up the whole of the earth. The SUN is the biggest heavenly body in our solar system. It is made up of hot, very hot gases. Invisible stuff!  Hydrogen and helium gases!  The UV rays can make you blind, while the infra-red rays can help you see in the dark. Do you see the cosmic balance and marvel? Our planet Earth, too, was a ball of hot gases billions of years ago. Today it has cooled off a bit, on the surface, but it is still very hot inside, near the core of the earth. We know this, when we see some volcanoes spilling out hot lava. The earth is spinning at high speed on its axis without any electrical motor to power it.        

WATER 

The planet Earth is made up with 70% water & so are our bodies. But what is water made up of. It consists of gasses like Hydrogen & oxygen. Just inert stupid unfeeling gasses by themselves but when combined together they form the life giving liquid. Without water there would be no life possible on our planet. Water itself is tasteless but has the power to make things very tasty.


GRAVITY

At this high speed all living and non-living things should fly out into space.  But we do not. WHY? Because of an invisible force called GRAVITY. This force holds us down on to the earth. The invisible stuff again.     

MAGNETISM

How do ships and airplanes navigate? How do they find their directions and destinations in dark nights and foggy days? There is a small device called the magnetic compass. This is responsible for all the advancement today. What is around a magnetic piece of steel? Magnetic field the, invisible stuff. Our earth is also a giant magnet with its south end located in the North Pole and north end located in the South Pole. This is how the north tip of a magnetic compass is always attracted towards the south end of the earth’s magnet which is located in the North Pole.  All this is invisible stuff. Two thirds of the earth is water. All life is dependent upon water. But water itself, is made up of stupid unfeeling stuff called hydrogen and oxygen. All is invisible stuff.

FRAGRANCE

If your girlfriend was to come to you, into a totally dark room with a bouquet of roses, can you tell them apart? Of course you can, because roses have an invisible stuff around them. The rose fragrance fills up the room and your nose can tell all.

WAVES                                                              

In your air tight houses and apartments you can easily tune in to your favorite songs on the radio and movies on the television sets. These large radio waves and micro TV waves can penetrate anything even concrete walls. All this is really, the invisible stuff. Cell phone talks, email messages in all languages, text messages, by the millions are up in the air all over the world, criss crossing each other without getting mixed up, intelligent invisible stuff.

X - RAYS

As far as you know all solid looking things are solid: Wood, steel, granite, plastics. But for X-rays, these solid materials are extremely porous.  X-rays go through them very easily just like knife through butter.               

Paradoxically these powerful X-rays cannot go through our bones. This goes to show that our bones are stronger than steel. They definitely last longer than steel, because we are still, digging up bones of our ancestors, from millions of years ago. It is all about invisible stuff again.

CAUSE LIES OUTSIDE & EFFECT TAKES PLACE INSIDE

Now we come to the mysterious law of LOTUS SUTRA, the law of cause and effect. “MIYO HORANGE KIYO” The cause lies embedded in the outer shell of our body, while the effect takes place inside our core body.

INVISIBLE HUMAN BODY

If all things are made up of invisible stuff then what about our bodies. Yes definitely we too are no exceptions, and are made up of that same invisible stuff. We are 99% invisible and only 1% physical. Don’t be surprised, this is true. Your BRAIN is located in the small head, but where is the MIND, EGO, memory, emotions, past experiences, faith, fears, anger, guilt, despair, happiness, joy, ecstasy. All these invisible components of your body need lot and lots of space; hence they are located outside your body, all around us. The outer shell reaches out, up to three meters on an average. It can expand up to 10 meters or more, simply by concentrating on it. This is the real HALO, which was visible around many saints and holy men of the past. Such phenomenon is in the process of becoming extinct in present days. 

WE MAY BE NAKED BUT NEVER NUDE - BECAUSE OF SEVEN AURAS

We have seven layers over our skin which extends up to six inches away. These Auras are the real invisible stuff. Auras are the fields of energy surrounding physical objects and beings. Everything which exists vibrates with an energy. The Aura is the tangible manifestation of the vibrational energy signature of an object or person. In other words, the aura is the energetic field around a person, and it contains insightful information into their present state of being.

The seven Auras starting from inside are: Physical, Etheric, Emotional, Mental, Astral, Etheric template, Celestial Ketheric template. Next we have a large complement of twenty two chakras located over various locations of the body. There are seven basic chakras in pairs located over our spine from head to base. These chakras are conical wheels, spinning at very high speed facilitating the flow of cosmic energy into our body, to keep us alive and healthy. The seven chakras starting from head are: crown, forehead, throat, heart, solar plexus, hara, pelvic.

Their Sanskrit names being: Muladhara, Svadhisthan, Manipura, Anthanta, Vishudduhi, Ajna, and Sahasrara. The Individuation point lies 36 inches above the head while the Soul Seat sits in the upper chest. The Tan Tien point is located 2 inches below the navel and the Core Star point is just 2 inches above the navel. To protect all of the above we have a meter long health rays all around us running perpendicular to our bodies. Finally a spherical shell of etheric luminous ionized zone gives another protecting covering for all the invisible components which are responsible for everything that happens inside our physical bodies.                 

DREAMS

All day long we are thinking, imagining, and worrying, fearing, going into past, coming back to present and even venturing into future, too. We have to store up ninety years of stupid past experiences; hence we need lots of space, lots of software which is definitely located outside our body. At night when we go to sleep, we start to dream. We see dreams with our eyes closed. How powerful we are? Yet most of us feel powerless and helpless all our lives. We can see with the “eyes” of our mind. Is it not magic? We can also dream with our eyes open.

PRAYERS

You may need a laptop or a computer to send and receive your emails. If you happen to shoot out a nasty email, then it can be traced back to you for a penalty. But you do not need anything, except your mind to send and receive prayers, wishes, intentions, thoughts, and desires. They reach the person you want them to reach and affect them, yet they are untraceable. This invisible stuff is super intelligent and instantaneous, hence beware. It is not your fault that you do not know all this reality and facts, because no one ever told you about it. Now you know, hence be aware of your invisible body and use it to your advantage and for others too. Since the invisible body is in majority and the physical is very much in minority, we have to concentrate more on the invisible body. This is the difference in Real Anatomy and Gray’s Anatomy.

Personally, I check the functioning of my chakras, every month with the help of a conical wooden top, suspended by a thread. The tip of top is held one inch over the solar plexus, heart, forehead positions and allowed to oscillate on its own. Vigorous circular movement is a good sign. If the movement is skewed, sluggish and elliptical then corrective action is required immediately. The action happens to be a simple one hour meditation with colored air breathing for full body healing and alignment of chakras. I often channelize cosmic energy for healing other people, it automatically heals me first and then others through me. I am flooded with phone calls & emails from my friends and relatives to send them Distance healing / Distance Reiki. Every night before going to sleep I get into this ritual of sending Cosmic Energy/Reiki to all those who requested it, many times simultaneously to 3 or 4 people located in different continents. It always works and reaches them, because we are all connected by this wonderful cosmic grid. An ever smiling disposition helps me manage my NOW life moments with NOW mind & software.

Rohit Khanna - Reiki Doctor -  BEDSIDE MANNERS - no medicine

TAXING TRAUMAS & TREATING YOUR PAIN

  PAIN IS ACTUALLY AN OCEAN OF PLEASURE - NEW PARADIGM



  TAXING TRAUMAS

We come to believe very early in our lives that if we change then we will destroy our view of the small world we seem to own. When our first love is destroyed, crushed, distanced, from us, by some unforeseen trauma or an incident, then our view of first love is shattered to pieces. It was bound to happen, since everything is transient and temporary in this universe. But we wrongly come to believe that true love is forever, there will never be anyone else like our first love. We learn the wrong lesson, that you get just one chance to find and hold your true love, and love, is the only thing worth living for on this planet.

VIOLENT LOVE

Being in love with one particular person will make you happy, whole, and a perfect human being. This is your first Blocking belief in the series of other blocking belief’s to come. When a little girl is raped, violated, her mind will escape from her body and wander randomly. She will not feel the callused hands and fingers penetrating her private areas. She will not suffer the pain of a grown up oversize penis ripping the vaginal tissue of her vagina. Her mind goes numb, heart goes cold, and she goes in a state of shock.                

  REFUSAL TO CHANGE  FOR THE BETTER

Our traumas, toxic experiences keep us crippled because we hold them down in fear, in anger, and in shame. Change means throwing away the crutches of dysfunction and standing up without any external support, anew in a brand new world. Traumas cause pain to our minds, bodies, and soul resulting in Multiple Personalities Disorder. It numbs our minds and brings about total disassociation or short circuit only to protect us, our false images. It is inbuilt mechanism in our systems. The unconscious mind, which is very sensitive to pain, sends out an SOS signal to our conscious mind which perceives it as anxiety, on the physical level. All this is taking place automatically just to defend our Egoistic images of ourselves. In short we refuse to change, period. The massive momentum of the trauma overrides our capacity to change and the defense mechanism gets triggered to bring about Mental Illness, coupled with extreme anxiety. We choose to become Mad or mentally sick rather than change our view points. So strong are the roots, of strict childhood upbringing.

   PAST TRAUMAS FLOAT UP TOO

When traumas from this life are cleared to a certain extent through laying on of hands, or hands of healing, the past life traumas that are buried under, arise to the surface to be cleared. You are now faced with a brand new set of traumas which you are not even remotely aware of. Energy movement is a pleasurable experience. It can be positive or negative. Release of energy, through sex, is a negative pleasure. It is simply letting off build up steam. But the positive energy release is the point here. The original blocking belief of being separate from cosmic energy, angels, and people has to be understood and eliminated.

PAIN IS A SIGNAL TO HEAL

Fear and pain must be replaced by love and trust. Positive energy release will act as an antidote and bring about clarity & connect you to others. You must get back to being connected to your cosmic energy and angels, just as you were at the moment of your birth. Pain and suffering is inevitable in this world, but being miserable is optional. Pain is the greatest curse for the soul. It is just mental, a mere connection between you and the body. Bones and flesh are like wood in your furniture. How can furniture have pain? This is true. In the operation theater when we are sedated with anesthesia, we feel no pain at all. The doctors do their carpentry on our bodies with all their might and we let them do it quietly.

EXISTENCE IS A SUFFERING

Our existence is a suffering, awaiting destruction. Our birth is a suffering, when we are hurled helpless into this cold world. A good meal leaves us stuffed and uncomfortable. Attachment to a spouse leaves us worrying about being left alone. Parting with a loved one is suffering for us. We are chasing shadows in fear and anger, wanting to destroy things before they destroy us. Suffering has an origin, and that is the misunderstanding of reality. It feels more important for us to predict, that we are going to be miserable, rather be miserable for ever. Then the next moment, when we get into misery which we always will, we find silly pleasure in being right. We boastfully tell our friends, see! I told you, this will happen and it did. You have a fool proof, self-fulfilling prophecy. Suffering is a sure road, leading to short circuitry and insanity. Anxiety leads to suffering. Fear leads to suffering. The world is a perfect place. There is no fear or anxiety in it anywhere. There are only people, thinking anxiously and fearfully. It is the psychological state of feeling helpless and apprehensive. It is your funeral, buried by your own emotional poverty, sorrow, and ill health. We project anxiety and fear on the screen of the world and then experience it.  

  HEALING YOUR PAIN

A doctor or a surgeon, can repair a damaged heart, but never repair a broken heart. It is only YOU, who can do this. Of course a healer can help and assist. When you discover that something is broken in your life, mind, heart, or spirit, you must go deep down, to find out the cause of the breakage. So you open up the component, examine it minutely; find the origin of the breakage or malfunction. Then, you decide to fix it or replace it. If fixing is needed, got to do it very carefully, delicately and give it a test run.  Otherwise throw it away and replace it. Clean up the place, it once occupied. This is called Closure. It is a prerequisite, for HEALING. Many times, when love or lack of love, breaks our hearts, we allow our hearts to become brittle, hard and we close up, totally. We do not have to be so harsh, on ourselves. For your own sanity, accept it. It is another lesson to be learnt. The trick is, to LET GO. However, if you live long enough with a BROKEN HEART then you will eventually end up with a DAMAGED HEART, which of course a doctor can repair.

  LET GO 

Letting go, is accepting, learning and experiencing it, as you grow up.

Letting go, is to be thankful for the experience that made you laugh and cry.

To let go, is to cherish the memories, to overcome and move on. 
To let go, is not, thinking sad thoughts, and forgetting.

It is having an open mind and confidence in the future.

It is neither winning or losing, nor giving in.

It is not about pride and how you appear.

It is not obsessing or dwelling in the past.

It should not leave feelings of emptiness, hurt, sadness, anger, jealousy, or regret.

It is certainly about you; all you have had and will have, soon again.

Have the courage to accept change & summon up strength, to keep moving on. 
It is realizing that the heart can sometimes be the most potent remedy. Love is not a thing or a material object, which can be lost, when given. It is like an ocean. It is bound to come back, if you allow it. Be prepared to open a door, clear a path, and set yourself free. Break up! No, never. You have to do it gently, respect fully, do not be hard on yourself and the other person. Don’t fight sadness. Try to make it go away. Welcome it, indulge in it, feel it. Buy yellow roses as friendship signal and become stronger.                            

   PAIN & SUFFERING ARE SEPARATE ENTITIES 

Pain and suffering is inevitable in this world, but being miserable is optional. This brings the ball back into your coat. Pain in the human body is a signal for action. Physical harm or hurt, like an injury or a disease will cause severe pain. Now, is the time to get a doctor to make a house call on you? The doctor will examine you thoroughly and conduct a couple of tests, to make sure what and where the malady lies. If the results of the tests are positive, the doctor will take corrective action and fix your problem. If the results of the tests are negative, you are stuck with a bigger problem, which this doctor cannot fix.  It is chronic pain syndrome. Chronic pain is long lasting, irritant, dis-enabling you, from doing your normal social activities: working a job, loss of memory, upset appetite, sleeplessness, perpetual fatigue, slowing down in movements, saying no to sexual pleasures and missing out on laughter and joy, which life has to offer. Your cognition, about chronic pain is fundamental to this cause.                                    

In the primitive days, pain was associated with evil spirits.

In Judeo-Christian era, pain was accepted as punishment for our sins. 

In Greece, pain is taken up as a challenge to deal with.

In China, pain is identified with imbalance in Yin-Yang energies.

Today, pain is the basis of disease-medicine model for doctors.

                    

CHRONIC PAIN SYNDROME

When you continue to accept your cognition of pain syndrome, the pain persists and gets you into a vicious loop. Doubting emotions are self-fulfilling beliefs. First you lose hope and then lose control over self. The next set of emotions that take over, are anxiety, anger, revenge, for the person who you think, is responsible for your pain, depression, despondency, and finally frustration. All this is in your mind. The experts call it cognition dissonance. It is your inner turmoil resulting from contradictions in personal beliefs and behavior. Cognitive behavior embraces a whole range of mannerisms. You become visible to others, by using supports, canes, crutches, chairs. You also use rubbing, frowning, twitching, jerking, sighing, to draw attention. You voice yourself by moaning, complaining and verbalizing. When you are all alone you reinforce the thoughts by silly self-talk in your head. Why me? The pain hurts and hurts badly. The mind helps the body cooperate, by the absence of all brain-chemicals specially, endorphin's.

  SELF HYPNOSIS IS THE WAY TO GO

Chronic pain management encompasses three primary stages. Cognitive restructuring, is achieved by asserting yourself positively. You stop self-talk thoughts, by giving a command to self. Gradually you become useful, thus boosting up your self-esteem, to get out of the loop. Relaxation and deep breathing are recommended as the second step.  Self-hypnosis, by visualizing on pleasant events, helps on mental level. Lastly you must exercise to release brain chemicals in the system. Exercising additionally helps reconditions your muscles, tissues and stamina on the physical level.   

  Personally, I have no experience of any personal traumas luckily. However I got first hand lessons on traumas, because of being an apprentice to my father. I would listen to the background story of the patients who came home for treatments. Other horrible incidents were related to the whole family at the dining table for our benefit and learning. But the lesson here to be learnt is to let go, and move ahead in life quickly. You do not benefit in any way by holding on to the traumas. I was a born healer. I was consulted by my friends on many different problems as early as 16 years of age. I would ask them their monthly consumption of oil, sugar, rice and wheat in kilograms. Next I would advise them to simply change the ratios and see the results. It always worked. I was a social scientist right from start. There were no heart breaks because we were taught that right things will happen at the right time.  We studied in coed schools & always had friends of both sexes. On the home front,  we had a dozen she cousins & very close family friends to interact with and grow up congenially. I was the lucky one to go and live with my uncles, aunts for extended periods. I was introduced to yoga exercises at a very early age. In college I played all racket games; badminton, lawn tennis, squash, & table tennis to keep myself in perfect shape.

Rohit Khanna - IN-QUISITIVE, therefore happy & content.

ON BEING A MOTHER/PARENT - CLASS ON SELF WORTH

  ON BEING A MOTHER / PARENT

  LESSON ON SELF WORTH

Mothers provide the life blood, mind energy, and soul food, to every child who needs it, in order to flourish. Fathers show us how to survive; mothers teach us how to blossom. Mothers help to nurture, the unfolding of the soul, of the child. But when a mother does not know, she is a mother or how to mother, the children around her become lost. They learn the wrong lesson. She is not sensitive to their needs. Her words are spoken harshly and actions are abrupt. She is authoritarian. She knows the rules of mothering but does not possess the grace. The grace of the mother’s love will break the rules, when it is necessary in order to nourish a child.                          

NOT GOOD ENOUGH FEELING

In the face of an authoritarian mother or caretaker, a child’s growth is stunted. The child will have an unfolded heart. It is too difficult, even painful, for them to express, how they feel, or what they need. Unexpressed feelings and needs lead to anger and fear. Eventually they grow up to be a bad parent, with a closed heart. Children learn early in life, that adults place value on perceived beauty. Children who are not valued and protected feel that they are not beautiful and worthy of protection. The truth is that beauty is, on the inside not out there.                     

SENSE OF BELONGING 

Children yearn for their parent’s approval. They need to belong and this important need motivates our behavior in life. A little girls relationship with her father, impacts her relationship with men, in real life. Why are girls, into people pleasing, all the time? You cannot make people like you, no matter how hard you try.

NEED FOR ACCEPTANCE & APPROVAL

The lesson is: What you think about yourself, is more important, than what others think about you? Since you do not get external acceptance, and approval, you are desperately seeking; you reinforce the belief, that you are neither worthy nor valuable, or good enough. You continue to work harder, in the wrong direction, learning the lesson, upside down. Parents and role models distract you, from yourself. They are uncomfortable, giving you unconditional love. They want you to become, something else, apart from what you already are. They focus on your transformation and make sure that you are not content as you are. This implies that you are worthless. You are unworthy, undeserving, and not good enough. They teach you the wrong lesson to be dishonest with yourself. This is the starting point, of all future sufferings and miseries to come. 

  DADDY’S GIRL

All little girls, want to be loved, praised, and protected by their daddies. A daddy is a hero to his little girl, even if the whole world thinks, he is a bum. Daddy can do no wrong, except to hurt mommy. No girl wants to disappoint her daddy, so she tries very hard. Girls loved to be swooped up for a good job done, by their daddies, which is an essential element to the tender budding psyche of hers. No matter what is going on in the little girls’ life, she believes that her daddy can fix it, save her, and make everything better, even if, he cannot. Little girls learn a lot from the women, they grow up around, whether they are related or not. Older women are like midwives, who assist in the birth, of a young woman’s consciousness. Young girls with budding breasts and plump round bottoms need woman hood training, in the sacred art and science of becoming a woman. She must be extremely sensitive, of her feminine side, as it grows within her and through her.

MENTORING THE YOUNG PARENTS

Aim of parenting the children :

Structure their THINKING PROCESS

Build up SELF CONFIDENCE

Sharpen the INTELLECT

Enhance SELF ESTEEM

Facilitate DECISION MAKING

STOOP DOWN TO THEIR LEVEL

What do children like the most ? Fun, laughter & Playing games of make believe. I mean stupid games too. Act dumb often & see the magic happen. They have no BOX yet to think inside. Their creativity in unmatched & limitless.

Should the process of parenting be tough or simple ? Of course it must be extremely easy, such that even the child does not realize that he or she is being mentored at all.  

 WINNING WITH STRATEGY

Here we go….. The master strategy is all about QUESTIONS & more questions. We should not be TELLING them anything at all. They do not listen, anyway to our preaching nor do they believe a word of it. Their attitude is FIRST PRACTICE WHAT YOU PREACH. Consider this retort to be a silent reply from their side. This tells us pretty loudly that  they are adept COPY CATS / Imitating monkeys & we have to straighten our own act. 

SELF ASSESSMENT & INTROSPECTION

The first series of questions that  arise is for ourselves.

Do we make enough time to listen to them?

Do we spend time out doors exercising, walking, playing games, before telling them to do the same?

Do we swear in the company of our children?

Why do we shout at our spouses & them for silly reasons?

Do we get upset & display anger over trivial matters?

Do we converse slowly, calmly, softly or NO?

Do we appreciate each other often?

Do we give meaningful complements when the situation demands.

Do the children often find us dull, sulking & off mood?

I am sure that all of the above are applicable in most of us. If yes then, what next. They are going to pick up, absorb & imbibe all our negative traits automatically. THE ANSWER IS CHANGE, TRANSFORM, REFINE, REFORM SELF FIRST.

RE-FRAME YOUR COMMANDS INTO REQUESTS - sugar coat them with humility additionally.

Dear child, do you mind cleaning up the mess of scattered toys, alone or with mommy/daddy?

My sweet child, when will be the best time to finish your homework, before or after dinner?

My love, which of the chores would you prefer to take up : dish washing or folding up clothes?

Sweetheart, what is the best time for you to go to bed on school days : 8 or 9 pm.

Darling, will it be a good time saving idea to line up your uniform & bag at night : YES OR NO ?

My doll, can you ring the bell when you have done brushing up your teeth for the night?   

A word of caution - Shouting & Shooting out commands at small / tiny beings will definitely make  PERFECT REBELS out of them. Go ahead with your ancient up bringing & stubborn habits. 

TRAIN THEM TO THINK FOR THEMSELVES - OPEN ENDED QUESTIONS - have lots of patience

Is any issue bothering you?

Do you wish to panic & rush through in life?

What should you be doing to be at peace always?

If there is this Creation, Should there be a Creator?

What are you thinking right now?

Is it possible to slow down your thoughts/thinking?

What skills do you want to acquire?

Do you wish to learn & master any musical instrument?

Which sport will suit your personality?

You can take advantage of your height to compete in athletics & excel too?

Is public display of your personal emotion like anger, a healthy norm?

What will bring a lasting smile on your face?

  

GIVE THEM MULTIPLE CHOICES - TWO ARE MANDATORY.

Honey, where do you wish to celebrate your next birthday, at home or out in the public gardens?

Darling, for your graduation party, do you want to procure a new expensive gown or rent one for a small price?

My love, where should we plan our next family summer vacation, far away or near by?

Sweet heart, do you approve or disapprove of the continuous ingesting of harmful substances like cigarettes & alcohol?

SPEEDING UP THE PROCESS - This is a trap for them & a difficult one to escape from. Their decision becomes binding on them. It is good for both the child & the young parents.

INVOLVE THEM IN DOMESTIC/BUSINESS AFFAIRS - FOR CREATIVE SOLUTIONS

Can you help me in putting this IKEA bed together, please?

I would highly appreciate, your expertise in computers to fix my email glitch?

Our coffee table needs a new paint job, could you kindly pitch in during the week ends/holidays?

The family car has a flat tire, can we change it together as a Formula One team?

Our back yard could look fabulous with a minor trimming & hedge cutting, if you can lend a hand dear?

We need an extra pair of dexterous hands to help out in the kitchen, dear child, are you game for it?

SKILL DEVELOPMENT ON THE SIDE  - This system will encourage team work, co-operation, shouldering responsibility & natural bonding.   

WHEN CHILDREN ASK THE RIGHT QUESTIONS - be ready for them.

Firstly there are no wrong questions from a child's point of view. Every question is logical & genuine for the small developing brain.

Why is the sky blue?
Where do babies come from?
How the initial water on the planet appeared?
Why do we have to fight wars?
What is the difference between Virtues & Vices.

MAKING SEEKERS OUT OF THEM

Answer every question of theirs very very briefly. Use one or two words only & wait for their reactions. Follow up your two words with another standard QUESTION - My child, WHAT DO YOU THINK can be the possible answer. This is a million dollar strategy to get them to become a SEEKER / THINKER. The biggest development of your child will happen during this moment. Their self esteem gets a big boost,  sense of worthiness blossoms. They feels accepted as they are & feels Valued by the world.

THE VALUE OF NOT KNOWING

Answer all their stupid questions as if they are extremely meaningful. The second most important strategy is being HONEST ABOUT NOT KNOWING THE ANSWER to some of their questions. Say humbly & but clearly, my child, I DO NOT KNOW the answer to this question of yours. This will teach them the most important lesson of life - THAT PEOPLE DO NOT KNOW MANY THINGS and it is very very NORMAL thing, to, not to know. Once they do not know & this realization sits in their Intellect, then SEEKING will happen. I will go to the extent & pretend that I do not know on 50 % of the occasions. I will openly admit that I DO NOT KNOW just to enjoy the reaction of shock on their faces - DAD, REALLY YOU DO NOT KNOW? Of course my child, but we will try to seek the truth behind your question together. This togetherness business will create the bonding that lasts for their full life time.

PARENTS & TEACHERS ARE TRUE ROLE MODELS

Japanese children are among the calmest and most independent in the world, because their early years are filled with freedom, not pressure. Researchers show that daily routines and small interactions, rather than strict rules or drills, create emotional regulation and problem-solving skills years before Western methods do. Simple habits like brief back-and-forth conversations strengthen language and attachment, forming the foundation of a calm, confident child.

Independence is encouraged early. Japanese children take small errands alone, learning responsibility, self-control, and decision-making. Predictable routines for meals, baths, and bedtime provide security and reduce anxiety. Early play, rather than formal academics, builds focus, creativity, and self-regulation without stress.

Chores and micro-responsibilities teach accountability. Tiny daily tasks like carrying a bowl or folding a towel strengthen executive function while giving children a sense of contribution. Emotional coaching, where feelings are named and discussed, enhances emotional intelligence and communication skills.

Community trust allows children to explore safely. Adults model calm behavior, correct gently, and emphasize effort over perfection. Fresh air, brief outdoor exposure, and small challenges help regulate stress and improve immunity.

Start small. Daily habits like ten minutes of focused conversation, one solo task, and a consistent bedtime routine create lasting changes. Consistent, small practices beat flashcards, screens, or pressure every time.

 

Personally, I was fortunate enough to have a strong self-esteem because of my parents and close relatives. More credit goes to my mother for grooming me up in all areas of personality development. She insisted on sending us to boarding schools, Lawrence school Sanawar. It was the best thing that happened to me specially. At home I was the apprentice to my doctor dad, and helper assistant to my mom. She taught me how to shop for fresh and good vegetables, by looking for their firmness, texture, and color. My father taught me to be humble, helpful and I picked up invaluable bedside manners from him by being with him. A good doctor is 80% bedside manners & 20% real Anatomy / Medicine, because the cause of the illness / disease is in the invisible body & emotions which are recreating the malady despite the treatments - go figure.

Rohit Khanna -  Easy yogi