THE ART OF PEACEFUL LIVING - MARRIAGE BOX CONCEPT

CREATORS MARRIAGE BOX

IN-VERTED  PARADIGM

The long lost children have now been found & adopted by the Creator. He is the bridegroom who will be taking us into our new Home to IN-STALL us with Him. To begin with our first IN-NINGS the marriage box that we IN-HERIT  is empty, contrary to our IN-QUIRY & belief that we will find all the things we have longed for in marriage: IN-TIMACY, friendship, companionship, love, peace. 

IN-SERT  FIRST 

One must put in something before one can take out anything from the box. Love, Peace, Bliss are in the people / partners, not in the marriage or the stupid box. There is no romance in marriage box as yet. As an IN-FATUATED  couple we have to learn the art & form the habit of IN-COME first of giving, loving, looking at specialties, praising, serving, keeping the IN-FLOW into the box full before anyone partner can take out anything. If you take out more than you put in, the box will be empty soon or will remain empty. 

BENEVOLENT CREATOR

Creator is always first, in doing his part of the equation and keeps the marriage box overflowing with all the goodies. Now it is our turn to add into the box all that we have.  But what do we have is the big question to ourselves. 

JUNK IS ALL WE HAVE

On the long journey of 84 births spanning over an elapsed time of  5000 years, we have amassed lot of junk and piled it up over the valuable stuff that we had at the start of the beautiful journey. To dig out the valuable jewels we must throw out the piled up junk first into the IN-CINERATOR that has been positioned adjacent to the marriage box. Once the junk is IN-TOMB the incinerator you cannot retrieve it ever again in future. This was the hard part of the IN-BUILT bargain. 

DIG THE JEWELS OUT

Now that the jewels are accessible we must IN-DULGE & grab them, dust them off, and quickly put them into the marriage box to complete our part of the equation. The creator becomes very pleased at this herculean gesture of ours and so do we.

PRESCRIPTION - HAPPY RELATIONSHIP IN LIFE

RIGHT TO FREEDOM 

This is a very basic need  of all human beings. We have our BROUGHT FORWARD seeds / sanskars through which we all are acting all the time. Change is tough & time consuming. It requires a very SHARP IN-TELLECT to realize this aspect of acting. Our actions will continue to manifest impulsively, mostly out of unawareness which will never be palatable to the other partner / spouse. The reason being that we are all different, harboring almost opposite class of seeds / sanskars. Do not expect similar class of actions from your partner ever. Expectations are an excellent source of IRRITATION, & irritations cause IN-FLAMMATION inside. - Now you know.  

REFLEX ACTION  - CONTROLLING

The most obvious reaction to the repulsive behavior of the partner is to cut him off, negate him, disagree totally, & get into the impossible task of changing him, which adds up to CONTROLLING HIM,  24/7.
There you go, now you have a full time job, unpaid of course, frustrating absolutely because the results of the constant bullying never appear on the horizon.

CAN ONE EVER CONTROL THE WORLD

The answer is NO. You may like it or not. Lets come to your three year old toddler, can you control him ever. You have to keep a tab on him 24/7, run around the house behind him just in case he runs into dangerous situations which he will always. Can you control your teenage children. Again a big NO. They rebel, defy you, they leave the home to live separately on their own terms. Your ideas are outdated for them, so you keep them to yourselves. Now we come the main hero of the Drama of life, your spouse. Please remember that MEN ARE FROM MARS & WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS.
You both are DIFFERENT, get this in your head. Each of us will behave differently & no one is wrong or right, good or bad, just different. But we do not like it, so what is the solution to this very pressing mind boggling predicament.

EASY WAY OUT - TOLERATE 

Yes you got it. We all have to learn to tolerate the other persons actions, behavior, mannerisms & intentions too. Have mercy for the poor soul & tolerate with a heavy heart. FORGIVE FOR YOUR OWN SAKE. When you forgive the other person for offending you, in reality you are benefiting your self. If you continue to remain in HATE, then you are poisoning yourself only & no one else. Besides tolerating you have no other choice, so  understand this very well & come to terms internally, sooner the better for your own mental & physical health. 

COOPERATE WITH A SMILE

Life must go on & that too smoothly. Therefore get into the cooperation mode. Having taken MERCY on the poor soul & FORGIVEN him genuinely from inside, now is the time to SMILE IN-TERNALLY again for your own sake & COOPERATE whole heartedly for the common cause of the family, children & other relatives around in the home or far away.

KARMA IS THE REASON TO COOPERATE 

In the past life the male was a female & the female was a male. In this past life you SCREWED each other, now both of you have IN-CARNATED as a couple by DIVINE intervention, & not your own choosing to settle the BROUGHT FORWARD karmic account. Since it is your own DOING you better understand the COSMIC DRAMA in the right perspective & COOPERATE WILLINGLY the part of REVERSE SCREWING, with a smile. Just take it lying down happily & enjoy the ride.


THE PAINFUL PARTING WAY

Finally it all boils down to simple maths. We want to have our say & do our thing. We do not have the will to change ourselves for the better, while on the other hand  controlling others works in the opposite direction of antagonizing them. So the only choice we are left with is to TOLERATE & COOPERATE with a smile. When we fail to do even this much then the limits of PATIENCE are crossed & it makes good sense to go our own SEPARATE WAYS without any ILL FEELINGS, HATE FILLED IN-TENTIONS or EMOTIONS OF REVENGE.  Just part & live separately on your terms. Eventually both partners suffer a great deal on this account of holding up their EGOS, refusing to bend, let go & ACCOMMODATE the other into their lives. I feel sorry & sad for you guys. 

NETT OUT COME SORROW & MISERY  

Going separate ways means alienation from a cohesive group of friends & family. Sense of longing pervades both partners all the time, because it is not easy to obliterate the memories so quickly. Modified life style is down graded to a large extent because of financial crunch, single income now. Emotional drain is IN-VISIBLE but for sure a big one too. Energy wise both partners have to manage all the domestic chores single handed, which becomes a major set back on their leisure time. Eventually the path is laid out for LONELINESS FRUSTRATION DEPRESSION DOOMED & FUTILITY  - what is the use ATTITUDE. 
This can definitely lead to suicidal tendencies & attempts. - Go figure it for your self.      
  

A TWISTED VIEW OF MARRIAGE

People will see a man washing his clothes and instead of minding their business, they'll say "Ahh Oga Victor, go and marry so you'll stop washing".

They'll see a man cooking and be like "Bro John, you need to get married so you can stop cooking".

A mother will assist  her 35 years old son, who cannot wash his own boxers, boil water for tea or even make his own bed, a 35 years old that cannot take his plates to the kitchen after eating and tell him "James, you need to settle down, get a woman to take care of you". SERIOUSLY?? because she knows that she will be not there for him very soon.

In different ways, the society subconsciously tell men that they don't marry women for any reason, other than cleaning, cooking and childbearing. I begin to wonder, does the average man needs a wife or a glorified maid?

Many women look three times their age, all because of stress and exhaustion. You sit down in front of the TV with your phone and watch, while your wife works until she's about to pass out. REALLY??

Men, who told you that it is wrong to wash your own plates?

Who told you that it is wrong to wash your own clothes?

Who told you that it is wrong to make your bed when you wake up?

What will it take, to help your partner with chores in the house?

If a man wanted to be adopted as a child to be pet, pampered, fed and nursed, then, he need not to seek marriage, he should rather offer himself up for an adoption at a motherless home to be picked up.

BUT If you want a wife, to love, to cherish, to do different things with her, assist in some chores, and love her for the rest of your life, then get married.

AND if you are getting married because you feel you're becoming too old to do your own chores then get a maid.

Women are to be cherished, pampered and loved, not USED.

Rohit Khanna - IN-SITU & IN-SNARE

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RELATIONSHIPS BETWEEN BODIES OR SOULS - can be Blissful

  RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN TWO SOULS CAN BE BLISSFUL

If you try.......after all we are merely Balls of ENERGY. Our Earth suit is an assembly of atoms & molecules which is a loan that must be returned at the allotted time..... go figure. 

OUTER SHELLS ARE DIFFERENT BUT THE CORES ARE  ALWAYS SIMILAR


One person is a round ball of confusion. The Other person is a square cube of confusion. The third entity is a cylinder of commotion / situation. All interactions happen among-st these three entities leading to swearing, turmoil, anger, rage & sorrow, because when they interact they do not add up rather they multiply into infinite more confusions. 


DIFFERENCES HAVE WALLS, MOATS, NO BRIDGES TO CROSS OVER

The round ball wants the cube to become more rounded like him. He is unaware the the cube also wants the ball to chisel up into a six sided solid like himself. In addition both want to perceive the situation confronting them as similar & not different, so that they can arrive at a common agreable solution. 


NARROW TELESCOPIC VISION / SIGHT 

A common workable solution is never going to happen, because of the narrow telescopic vision that each are holding in their heads about the widespread  situation. One telescope is pointing towards east of the situation while the other telescope is pointing towards the west of the situation totally diametrically opposite directions. One shouts, do you see my view point & the other snarls back, do you see my point of view. Both of them will never see each others narrow & different view points about the very same situation.   


WAY OUT IS THE WAY IN

Drop the telescopes & open your eyes wide for a wide angle view points of the situation causing the commotion. Since One & the Other desire to merge into each other, therefore drop the hard fixed outer shells & develop soft, cloud like outer coverings which have no boundaries. Since the cores of all of us are similar then where is the problem. Just stay in your own Self respect & give due respect to the other Souls. Soul consciousness is the way out by going in first.   
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SWAPPED REMOTES

How we get hurt by our own beloved / dear ones ?  On this long journey of relationships the REMOTE CONTROLS get swapped. He is operating the buttons of Her remote control gadget &  She is manipulating His remote control without the knowledge & awareness of such a tragic error. It amounts to one person having & operating the ELECTRONIC TRIGGER of the Other persons CANNON. Sure enough you are going to HURT your self really bad every time you press the trigger & fire off the Cannon which is always aimed at you. 

We always have a choice to exercise our Will, Intellect to refrain from such a childish behavior. Only small children get themselves into complex situations & hurt themselves when they quietly sneak away from the parents Radar. No one can hurt you. It you & you alone have the capability to create HURT from within, when you confront a stimulus from the opposite side / world. Pay attention 24/7 & see the magic happen in your life.      

INTERACTING THROUGH BLANKETS OF DESCENDED FOG 

Fog of Superiority worn by one partner simultaneous with a different fog blanket of Inferiority worn by the other partner. How on Earth can you communicate harmoniously with each other with such handicaps. It is almost akin to driving your car BLIND FOLDED, with blinkers ON for others to see your foolishness. 

Inside the these blankets each is stuffed with space suit style overalls of EGO. This further hampers the maneuverability of the occupants to lead peaceful lives. Superiority complex coupled with Ego is a deadly weapon to instigate the other handicapped partner. On the other hand Inferiority complex coupled with Bloated Ego is equally lethal armament to cause massive damage when provoked, which happens very often. To cover up the Inferiority the other partner resorts to shouting, raising the voice to high pitch, faking emotional trauma, crying, sobbing with crocodile tears to gain sympathy & win the battle any how. In reality both are loosing the prime war of Happy life & Optimum health, by trying to count the small battles they win. Nett result is both partners end up SULKING till sickness or death separates them apart.  

     

 YOU & SIGNIFICANT OTHER

Types of relations that do exist : Visible or Invisible 

Vibrations of intentions, thoughts, & feelings transmitted as follows.

Eye contact - ogling, trespassing, or loving Drishti.

Facial expressions - of scorn or of love, compassion

Body language - closed /crossed arms or open arms.

Stance & gait - fast & in haste  or slow & steady.

Actions -  violent or congenial

Oral words - harsh, abusive, or sweet.

Language selection - harsh mother tongue or sweet foreign.

RELATIONSHIPS  -  DISTANCING  VS  INTIMACY

PREDICAMENT:

This person has been positioned in your 84^th life by the Cosmic DRAMA for a reason. You are tricked by Maya through infatuations and sugar coated attractions. A stranger to begin with, soon you swear you cannot live without them. Some more time lapses & the relationship turns sour/bitter when the sugar coating is gone.

CREATIVE SOLUTIONS FOR MUTUAL HARMONY :

A}This soul is Creators long lost now found child too, hence handle with utmost respect and care. Be a flower around them, never a thorn to prick and give sorrow.

  

B} They are a perpetual obstacle in your path of Golden age/purity for helping you to pass with honors. How you get around is your task/extreme effort of radiating pure vibrations. They are your test papers.

C} Your partner’s positive talent is their alertness/awareness.  Hence you can appreciate this talent often by shooting sweet arrows of smiles from the bow of your lips

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D} This is definitely a tight rope walk for all of us with a long balancing pole which  consists of cooperation loaded with tolerance on left and compassion sugar coated with mercy on the right.

E} Let this soul do most of the talking and you do the difficult part of listening. They are letting out their past, help them like a therapist.

F} First transform yourself, they will get the message quickly and easily through your vibrations. Speak softly, slowly and sweetly. Have positive intentions for them.

G} Perfect maturity on your part means you treat them as Creators guests and shower love all the way, no matter what.   

H} English language has a wonderful word which can diffuse any horrible situation in a second. Use this word as often as possible. Saying SORRY & MEANING IT TOO. Be really sorry on your or their parts. 


Do you get it, if you did, then you too would be like......


Rohit Khanna - IN-SIGHTED therefore EX-CITED 

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