HOW WE MAKE RELATIVES OUT OF STRANGERS & OWN THEM ?
DIVINE RELATIONSHIP
Relationship with the Divine must be wide & deep. Wide enough to cover all beings on the planet & deep enough to get to the bottom of the ocean of Love. This aspect has the power to change the melody of our life instantly.....fulfilled, desire-less, & empowered.
PEACEFUL RELATIONSHIP
A peaceful relationship exists in many religious organizations such as the one at Mt. Abu of the Brahma Kumaris. Thousands of souls co exist without any overlay of power. They live & work together in a circle of friendship without someone being in charge. Here they learn to BE IN-CHARGE first, then all else flows automatically like a clockwork, efficient, peaceful & blissful. Sharing with such simplicity & beauty. Each second more aware of others than themselves.....cooperating, helping & benevolent for all.
PERFECT RELATIONSHIP
A perfect relationship is not of a slave’s submission to a master. It is a relationship based on sharing life in a single plane of circle between brothers & sisters. We Earthlings have a hard time sharing anything with others, be they known or unknown. This life is an anteroom of greater reality to come very soon. We all souls must RE-TURN home to the Divine & then come down gradually in small numbers to our cleansed new world, where we share open heartedly, because we do not know otherwise......magical, as it was meant to be in paradise.
LOVING RELATIONSHIP
A loving relationship can happen by learning to live as loved fully. It is very natural to live loved & loving to all other souls. A soul is a free spirit. We have no concept of final authority among-st us, only unity. Love does not force ones will on others. It is gentle. You must open up on your own. It needs lots of hard work & effort to achieve this level. Love does not grow. It is the knowing that grows & love simply expands to contain it. Knowing is the skin of love. Trust is the fruit of a relationship in which you the soul know that you are loved. You love each person differently because of who they are & their uniqueness that they draw out of you. The more you know another the richer the colors of that relationship. It is spiritual, know, connect, feel, the other. A relationship of love & mutual respect for each other.....to thrive in unconditional love, harmony, peace, Bliss.
LIMITED RELATIONSHIP
A limited relationship surfaces when we live as unloved. Human beings were created to be loved. So for us to live as if we are unloved is a limitation, not the other way around. Living unloved is like clipping the birds wings & removing its ability to fly. Most birds were created to fly. Being grounded for them is a limitation, within their ability to fly.....to be left out of the fun, aliveness, ecstasy of being together.
PARENTAL RELATIONSHIP
We as parents love each of our children differently, because each of them is unique. That uniqueness & person-hood calls out a different response from us the parents. When a child is born to us, they bring about a whole new capacity to love them, specially fond of each one. When they do not behave or make their own choices, we do get embarrassed or angry. This may affect our pride but not our love for them.....to relish in their growth & comradeship.
NOUN DEAD RELATIONSHIPS
Laws grant you the power to judge others & feel that your standard is higher than theirs, whom you judge. Rules give you the power to accuse in-vain attempts. The subtle forms of enforcing rules are RESPONSIBILITY & EXPECTATIONS These words are grammatically NOUNS. Nouns make the world deadly & sound dead. It is full of principles, fears & rulings. Responsibility translates down to long unwritten unspoken lists of tasks to be performed on your own. It also provides the essential frame work that promotes performance as the basis for Identity & Value. Expectations spoken or unspoken imply a U-turn, a prerequisite in a relationship you are expected to carry out to a high level of perfection, in a way that meets my expectations, all dead stuff, requirements, generally never specified or listed down & made known to the opponent. They lead to guilt, shame & sentencing. You are trying to control behavior & get desired results.... of alienation breakups & divorce.
VERB ALIVE RELATIONSHIPS
In the absence of laws you have immense freedom of choices. The same subtle forms now emerge as ABILITY TO RESPOND & EXPECTANCY instead. These verbs are dynamic & alive. They are full of life & possibilities. You choose every moment to respond differently & positively. The ability to respond encompasses very high level of awareness & soul consciousness. The other person is viewed as unique soul who is on his personal more complicated & tough journey. Hence responding with politeness, compassion & love makes all the difference to him & you. Both benefit from this single act of goodness & positivity. When you & I are friends, then there is an expectancy that exists within our relationship. Expectancy of being together, laughing & talking. It is alive & dynamic. Because I have no previous agenda you do not disappoint me, hence happy together.... for this lifetime.
JUDGMENTAL RELATIONSHIPS
We judge people & situations all the time, every moment. Judging presupposes that you think yourself superior over the one you judge. It is your Ego. This vast experience makes us into experts by all accounts. Judging encompasses jumping to hasty conclusions from the way they impact us. It is definitely a self centered view point of the world around us. The mental-ism involved in judging is grading, giving marks out of ten, as if you are a certified teacher/instructor, classifying, categorizing, labeling, accepting, rejecting, check marking as right just OK, wrong, or down right blasphemous. The basis of our judgment is the criterion we uphold in our lives, which could be sometimes broad, but generally very narrow. We pass judgments like a supreme court barrister would on actions & motivations, as if we know the whole truth, which in reality is otherwise. We are quick to judge color of skin, body language, body odor, history & their relationships. We never hesitate to to rank the value of a persons life by the standards of quality of our concept of beauty..... thus limiting ourselves to a select few numbers who tolerate you.
Self judging exercise - Sit comfortably, die alive & Judge yourself, your own life. Do a self assessment of intoning your infinite sins as an impartial judge - before the real trial.
PAINFUL RELATIONSHIPS
Painful relationships evolve as we grow up & involves most of us. All evil flows from your choices, your egoistic madness to be independent. The flood of freedom, the power of independence is intoxicating in the beginning. Your beliefs are based on illusions & lies. What you perceive is Right but you are still Wrong. Our beliefs are indelibly etched into our memories. We treasure our stupidity, our imaginary independence. We hoard & hold our mental sickness with a firm grip & then find our Identity & worth in the brokenness, which we guard with every ounce of strength we can muster up. Paradigms power perceptions & perceptions feed emotions. Most emotions are responses to perceptions, hence misleading you into destruction & chaos in life. You may not see the chaos, but God sees the FRACTAL. All things must unfold. He is very patient with us & assures us that we have a life time to sort things out on our own. We even resist Divine help at this point. We are unable to fathom HIS silent support in our deep sorrow. How will Divine Grace touch us when we have padlocked the basement of our hearts from inside. At this point simply accept what is, instead of trying to fit it into your preconceived notions, with little success. You use pain to force people back into your lives. You replace Love with Sympathy & Pity.....stagnate in the relationship as unwanted & unloved.
UNFORGIVING RELATIONSHIPS
It is an incredible power, that we share with Gods. To forgive is to start a reconciliation process. You have the possibility to grow into a relationship with an unknown enemy. Forgiveness is first, primarily for you the forgiver. To release you from something that will eat you alive & destroy you, your joy & ability to live fully & openly. Your forgiveness is not about forgetting. It is about letting go of another persons throat. This helpless person feeds on violence. You have the power to cut it off by forgiving him & redeeming him. Release him from the burden he carries, knowingly or unknowingly. When you choose to forgive another you love him well. Your enemy is an innocent broken child, in an adult body, who has been twisted by pain inflicted upon him by the world. Every time you forgive, the MATRIX of the Universe changes for the better. We need just a million souls to alter the Consciousness of the entire Universe to reach that tipping point & create the new world order for the whole of humanity of eight billion souls. You could be a part of this big Divine crusade if you choose to.... & hasten the process of change in yourself first & your relationships with all others.
FRAGILE & DICEY RELATIONSHIPS
WILTING, SULKING, & SIMMERING IN
It is up to us to be in a relationship or not to be in it. Today we are friends with full enthusiasm, tomorrow we can be sworn enemies. The catch is extremely subtle, that we continue to be in an abusive relationship & we pay a very heavy price for it latter on as time goes by. The reasons / excuses to prolong the undesired relationship can be innumerable. They could be financial, family / peer pressure, public shame, loss of Ego, stubbornness & finally lack of courage to hit back & breakup.
THERE ARE TWO PATHS TO MOVE AHEAD :
THE EASY PATH OF BONDAGE & UNPLEASANTNESS
ACCOMMODATE
Start with unconditional ACCEPTANCE of self. This is a pretty significant point in the over all scheme of things / drama of life. Using little creativity will help immensely to adapt yourself to the situations & other SOULS around you. Learn at every step to fit into the bigger picture. Remember that other souls are struggling too, just like you, but failing for some unknown reason, to accommodate you in their lives. Therefore why not take the lead & you begin the process of change.
TOLERATE
Be patient & stretch your boundaries gradually. Having accommodated as above, tolerating is implied & done willingly on your part. All insinuations, remarks, foul language, tantrums of rage must be taken lightly & never personally. Be aware that all souls are learning their lessons simultaneously, & you are helping them do so. After all it is your combined KARMA coming back from previous births. It is preferred that you settle it quickly in this life itself with a smile or else it will carry forward to the next life in bigger proportions.
COOPERATE
Pinned against the wall you have limited choices. It pays to cooperate with full support, because it brings in harmony to some extent. Be incognito & humble about the help & cooperation. Let me put you in a real life scenario.
Scene 1: Would you hug & genuinely caress a diseased dirty beggar picked up from the road side. NO! a big no. Why may I ask ? Well to assist you, I wish to add that hugging is a therapy for healing oneself & the other.
Scene 2: You are a registered nurse at the hospital & the very same dirty beggar is brought & admitted into your hospital under your care. Now, without even blinking you will proceed to clean up this beggar & help him in every way to make him comfortable. You even hug him in times of his distress. Do you see cycle of destiny & the bigger cosmic picture. No to first situation & Yes to the second set up.
THE TOUGH PATH OF LIBERATION & PLEASANTNESS
DISCERN THE PREDICAMENT
Weigh the positive benefits against the negative short comings of the predicament that you are entombed in. Discern the illusion from the truth by going deeper into the situation. Do a complete introversion & eliminate all mental conflicts so that you can see things as they should be seen.
DECIDE UPON ACTION PLAN
Having done the discerning, now consciously choose to act with trust & full confidence in your action plan. Choice brings in the essential support & respect that you desperately need at this moment. How ever you must not let your guard off, & keep attention on thoughts words & deeds. If you have decided to walk off from the situation, fair enough, do it boldly & congenially.
FACE CALMLY & COURAGEOUSLY
Express openly with maturity & respectfully. Offer self as a conduit of Peace. If this matter has to end, let it end on a friendly note. Remember that the missiles & vibrations of SPITE / HATRED will continue to be sent out & will reach you invariably, if not resolved now. The other average soul just like you, is in hurt & can not forgive plus forget so easily the whole fiasco. They do not have access to this wisdom that you have chosen.
DETACH & WITHDRAW
Step back & allow space to the other soul. Do the closing act slowly. Be centered & listen sincerely to all the high lights of the relationship, if brought up in the final conversations. Now is also the time to reflect on values dear to both concerned.
LET GO OF PAST
Do not ruin your present & future by holding onto the unpleasant past. Be non judgemental & detached. Just let go of all make believe attachments. Start afresh to grow back again strong & renewed.
Rohit Khanna - IN-STILL & IN-STALL
ALL 10
E-BOOKS BY AUTHOR FOR YOUR BENEFIT
